Friday, July 28, 2006

Fuck the Joneses.

'nuff said, right? Of course not!

I went on a mini-road trip today and had lots of car thinking time. I was thinking how I don't think it's important to keep up with mainstream society. I started thinking about some of my friends who would agree with me, but then if I really think about it...their "Joneses" still exist, just a different breed. The Joneses who need to impress each other with their "naturalness". You know the ones, uber-crunchy to the point of ridiculous. They are all about impressing their other crunch friends with how "against the norm" they can be. It's not about living deliberately and like they want to live, it's living to impress others. The others just aren't what we normally think of. Getting in a pissing match over who breastfed their babies longer, who buys more organic food. I know someone like this. They talk all about how "liberal" they are. But you know what? They are wearing their hippy clothes and going "au natural" JUST LIKE ALL THEIR FRIENDS. But when it really comes down to the natural sides of life, what do they do? Well, they don't cloth diaper. They don't breastfeed past 6 mos. They gag at the thought of cloth menstrual pads. And they drive a freakin' Tahoe even though they only have one small child.
Well guess what!? Sometimes I rock out in the car to Britney Spears. And the Def Leppard Greatest Hits CD may be one of the best things I can think of right now. LOL.
I might wipe my butt with flannel, but I'm not above marrying a dude from the trailer park. And I LOVE bacon. What would my Buddhist brethren think?

Sometimes mainstream is just fine.

Be who you really are :)

Sunday, July 23, 2006

A Loan we can feel GOOD about

My hubby got a truck a few days ago. We've been needing one to haul crap around for a while now, as we don't really have a friend who has one we can borrow. My hubby prefers a truck anyway, so we replaced the Civic for it. No biggie.

The best part about it is that I'm proud of how well we did with the loan. The hubs previously worked for a company with a Credit Union. A real Credit Union with only 2 employees where the interest is dispersed among all the accounts. They gave him a good interest rate, and we aren't giving our hard-earned cash to "the man". I'm happy to give money to a bunch of foundry workers, screw that CEO with a mansion and a multi-million dollar salary.

I'm so glad that he remembered that he was still a member of the Credit Union. It warms my heart to know that any future *necessary* debt will be to them. When I say debt, I mean like if our AC unit breaks in July, and we need $1000 to fix it. I don't mean debt because I want to go to Red Lobster and charge it or I think I need a new iPod. I'm done with that crap.

Living within my means. Priceless.

Step one on time management

I've long known that my time arch-rival is the internet. It's an addiction. When I don't get online for a few hours, I feel like I'm missing something. Like someone might send me a million dollars to my paypal account, and I'll miss it.
My real nemesis is a chat board. I go there and just 'browse' to waste time. Read some, post some, but usually just a time-catcher. I took myself off of it today. Took away the temptation. The hubby says I will just replace the time with reading blogs. I disagree, I think that with a discussion board, you can click "new posts" throughout the day and see new things to read. With the blogs, people post once a day. I read a new post, I'd done until the next day.
So in 1 month I'll report back and report whether or not my husband is right :D

Thursday, July 20, 2006

Homework for Lesson 4

I'm taking this online course through Barnes & Noble, and there are just too many people there. When I started, I thought it was so great. I thought I'd be able to follow along with the post and get insight and ideas from other students. Now there are so many participants that I just can't read it all. I scan through for posts from the instructor and friends who are on there, but that's about it.
I figure it's part of my simplification....spending less time on the computer! I read what I need to and get off. (and for the record, I'm typing this as my children have a snack)

Anyway, here's my "homework" for journaling:
The introductory quote at the beginning of the work chapter is "What is at the center of your life? Carefully examine where you spend your attention, your time. Look at your appointment book, your daily schedule…. This is what receives your care and attention—and by definition, your love." When you look carefully at your daily schedule, what do you see?
I see chaos. I see someone who spends too much time on the computer "playing" just to waste time. I've started making progress on this. I realized that I compute because the baby is crabby & needs to be held, and I can't possibly get any housework done lugging around 22 lbs. That's okay, though, he needs me, and I enjoy the cuddly time. But what I DON'T have to do is sit here at the computer. I can be sitting in the floor interacting and playing with my other children as I entertain the baby. I've been doing that a lot today, and it feels great.

Consider these two rules from Janet Luhrs's dad: 1) Find something you love to do and get paid for it. 2) Live under your means. If you followed those two rules, would you spend your time in a different way? How?
Well, I'm pretty much there. I quit working outside of the home, and I sew to make money. I enjoy sewing. A lot. I already live at or below my means. It's a work-in-progress, but it's almost there. I don't "need" all the things that others think are necessary to live. I've lived above my means for a loong time, and it doesn't feel good. Where I"m at now is in limbo in between, but for once, I can see light at the end of the tunnel, and it feels GOOD. I spend my time doing what I need and want to do as opposed to trying to figure out how to get the next bill money. Now, when I sew, I enjoy it more. Before, when I sewed, I felt stressed and pressured to get things done because we needed the money.

Do you feel that you are spending as much time as you'd like with your family? If not, what changes do you need to make in your life?
Yes. One of the reasons I strive to simplify our life and live below our means is so that my husband will be able to do the same.

What is your definition of success?
Enjoying what you do.

Homework for Lesson 4

I'm taking this online course through Barnes & Noble, and there are just too many people there. When I started, I thought it was so great. I thought I'd be able to follow along with the post and get insight and ideas from other students. Now there are so many participants that I just can't read it all. I scan through for posts from the instructor and friends who are on there, but that's about it.
I figure it's part of my simplification....spending less time on the computer! I read what I need to and get off.

Anyway, here's my "homework" for journaling:
The introductory quote at the beginning of the work chapter is "What is at the center of your life? Carefully examine where you spend your attention, your time. Look at your appointment book, your daily schedule…. This is what receives your care and attention—and by definition, your love." When you look carefully at your daily schedule, what do you see?
I see chaos. I see someone who spends too much time on the computer "playing" just to waste time. I've started making progress on this. I realized that I compute because the baby is crabby & needs to be held, and I can't possibly get any housework done lugging around 22 lbs. That's okay, though, he needs me, and I enjoy the cuddly time. But what I DON'T have to do is sit here at the computer. I can be sitting in the floor interacting and playing with my other children as I entertain the baby. I've been doing that a lot today, and it feels great.

Consider these two rules from Janet Luhrs's dad: 1) Find something you love to do and get paid for it. 2) Live under your means. If you followed those two rules, would you spend your time in a different way? How?
Well, I'm pretty much there. I quit working outside of the home, and I sew to make money. I enjoy sewing. A lot. I already live at or below my means. It's a work-in-progress, but it's almost there. I don't "need" all the things that others think are necessary to live. I've lived above my means for a loong time, and it doesn't feel good. Where I"m at now is in limbo in between, but for once, I can see light at the end of the tunnel, and it feels GOOD. I spend my time doing what I need and want to do as opposed to trying to figure out how to get the next bill money. Now, when I sew, I enjoy it more. Before, when I sewed, I felt stressed and pressured to get things done because we needed the money.

Do you feel that you are spending as much time as you'd like with your family? If not, what changes do you need to make in your life?
Yes. One of the reasons I strive to simplify our life and live below our means is so that my husband will be able to do the same.

What is your definition of success?
Enjoying what you do.

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Don't Gloat



'Cause then you will wake up one morning to a kitchen looking like
<---THIS. I posted last night bragging about how I had loaded the dishwasher and then used the same 4 plates all day. Well, the girls had gone to their father's house for the night. I made myself and Kevin a scrumptious Blueberry Cobbler from the blueberries my sweet neighbor brought me, and then we ate the ENTIRE thing. Apparently, good cobbler has the same effect as booze, because I must have blacked out about the sink. Have you ever read anything about "Flylady"? It's a site/book about organizing your life and keeping things nice and tidy.

One of the big things from Flylady is to always keep your kitchen sink sparkling. When I first read it, I did it pretty religiously for about a week. But you know how it goes- messiness is like an addiction, slip just one time and it all goes down the toilet. I remembered this morning and immediately shined my sink after making breakfast. Nice work, if I say so myself.

According to Flylady, if you keep your sink clean at all times, even when your house is really messy, and you are feeling depressed about it, you can go to your kitchen and admire your beautiful sink. And you know what? It really DOES make you feel better. So ladies....GO SHINE YOU SINK :)

I haven't been keeping up with the Barnes & Noble class, shame on me. I haven't even read the book in 2 days. When my girls leave tonight, I PROMISE I will read and try to catch up. Kevin was very ashamed that I wasn't able to "keep up with my homework".

I took a cleaning sabbatical the last few days too. I don't know what the deal is, I'm just sitting on my ass playing on the computer instead of doing "real work". BUT, I did finish 80 unpaper towels of various sizes, 40 bibs, and an organic cotton outfit to sell at this weekend's craft fair :) I guess that counts for something! I also cleaned and organized my sewing area a little.

So maybe I *have* been doing something!

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

I am very lucky indeed

I feel very fortunate that i have a hubby who is "into" simplicity like I am. We have some different ideas and thoughts on it, but we feel the same about the basic concepts. He has been reading the Simple Living Guide along with me and has had quite a bit to say about a few things in it. Some good, some bad, some eye-opening.

As for my progress of decluttering the homestead, I haven't made any progress the last 2 days. I've been sewing for a craft fair this weekend and playing with the kids a lot. Baby boy is in a "hold me now" stage, so I have to just sit around a lot with him in my lap. He's too big to carry around and do anything! I sure will be thankful when he can walk.

I do have one accomplishment today. The girls & I have been eating off the same 4 plates all day. I just wash them off after every meal and sit them aside for the next. I want to start doing this every day. I find myself running the dishwasher TWICE a day lately, and that's just ridiculous.

Saturday, July 15, 2006

You get what you pay for

most of the time, that is. I don't know what made me think of this today, but I did. I think it's important in the simplifying process. It's one "lesson" my father and grandmother were very adament about. When I married, Granny said she was buying my washing machine. Why just a washer? As per Granny, because you can air dry anything, so a washer is more important. When I went to buy it, she told me to get a Kenmore because they were reasonably priced and long-lasting. Okay. And then she said not to get the most expensive just because someone else was buying. But also not to get the least expensive, because it won't be as durable, and I'll have to end up paying for repairs in a few years. So I took her advice and got the mid-priced washer. Not too many bells & whistles- soak mode and pre-wash cycle, extra-large capacity. And I've been washing the hell out of cloth diapers for the last 6 years with no problems.

You get what you pay for. Simple enough, but think about it. Buy some cheap-ass washer for say, $100. 2 years later it breaks, so you pay $50 to fix it. Again in a few more years. Well guess what? You could have spent $200 originally and saved yourself the trouble. (and I'm totally making up numbers here, I have no ideas how much washers or repairs cost right now). Obviously, it doesn't always work out that way, but you really should research what you buy and buy SMART, not just frugel. When I was a teenager, I had a friend whose dad was a mechanic. He would buy the shittiest, cheapest car he could find and "fix it up" for her. And then spend the next year picking her up when it broke down and "fixing it" again. Then buy another car and do the same cycle again. I figure by the time she was 20 years old, if you totally up all the quick fixes and supplies he bought, she could have had a freakin' Maserati.

I think our "Wal Mart mentality" in today's society hurts us. We look at most items as disposable.

I use as much cloth as I can in my home: cloth diapers, cloth baby wipes, cloth kitchen towels, cloth menstrual products, and yes...cloth toilet paper. I can't even imagine how much money I have save on paper towels alone. We still buy paper tp 'cause....well... there are some things I don't ever need to see, much less wash :D, but I buy less than 1/2 the amount of tp than I used to.

I'm not sure where I'm going with this post! Just rambling, so I'll end it here. Have a nice day.

Friday, July 14, 2006

The liquidation

How do you go about getting rid of your extra stuff? I like to give it to friends and family, but I feel a certain sense of guilt. I'm getting rid of it to simplify my home. Sometimes, I feel like people take what I have to quench their own "well...it's free" addictions, and they don't really *need* it. So my shirt is just going from one mama who doesn't need it to another.

Is that insane?

Thursday, July 13, 2006

Multi-tasking

I was reading a lot in my book last night for my online course about how bad multi-tasking really is. Doing more than one thing at once usually means you are not doing your best at either thing. So today I go to the park with the children, and I see this: mom w/ stroller talking on cellphone. I was thinking of how many things she was doing at that one moment: exercising, spending time with her child, talking to someone, and "enjoying" nature (this was at a nice, woodsy park). Now, could she possibly have been doing any of these things well? No way. She looked to me more like someone on the verge of a nervous breakdown.

Children really complicate the whole "one thing at a time" concept. It's hard, especially with more than one child. I've been thinking about this today and trying to be fully involved in just one thing at a time. I realized that a lot of the time, I will be fully engrossed in something and a kid does something else that requires my immediate attention. I also realized that I still don't have to do more than one thing- when a child needs me, I simply STOP what I am doing and assist them with my full attention. Then I go back to the task at hand with my full attention, again.
Until I really thought about this today, I would just do 2 things at once. And you know what it did? Well, obviously, it made do neither the best I could, but it also made me aggravated, stressed, and angry. Trying to put a bandage on a boo-boo and read an email at the same time is just setting myself up for pissy. So no more. I will concentrate on this more and try to do better :)

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

Cleaning the Pig Sty...Stage 1

I'm starting with TOYS. I got the gals to bring all the toys from all over the house into the Living Room to sort through them all and organize. I felt like we were drowning in toys, but 'ya know what? Once they are all together and contained, there really weren't that many excess toys. I threw away all the little crap (like things they got in Kids' meals or freebies that were being handed out to kids somewhere/anywhere/everywhere). We put all stuffed animals in one big bin, all dress-up clothes in same size bin, and then everything else fit in 4 little baskets to be sat along the walls of the room/s. We have a "playroom" AKA place where we put all the toys, dollhouses, and desktop computer. There's a little twin bed in there for when the kiddos are fighting at night and we have to seperate them (.....now, now, you know you've had to do it too!) and for our occasional overnight guest. 3 of the girls all share the same bedroom, so it's really just beds and clothes.

I have an underbed storage box started for Garage Sale items.

I still have to better clean the room w/ the toys and get it like I want it. Next comes the kids' bedroom which shouldn't take too terribly long as there isn't much in it.

Next comes the kitchen- I want to put away all the extra plates, glasses, silverware. I had an awareness yesterday as I was loading up my SECOND dishwasher full- I use everything we have and then wash. Silly. If we only had 1 plate, 1 bowl, 1 cup, 1 set of silverware each, then I could just quickly wash them up after every meal, put them on the counter, and use them again for the next meal. Only run the dishwasher when I'm cooking alot and using a lot of mixing bowls, utensils, that sort of stuff. Sound good?

The other things will be:
My bedroom, my closet- the messiest of all because no one ever sees it.
Baby clothes and cloth diapers- get rid of what we don't really use
Photographs and scrapbooks/baby books- these are all over the house in no particular organized fashion.
Sewing Stuff- I've accumulated waaaay more "projects" than I will ever get to.

And last will be my garage with the finale being closing it in so we can make a spare room.

:)

Monday, July 10, 2006

Journaling

I started a course on Barnes & Noble University's website today. It's about Simple Living, and in the course description, the instructor recommends keeping a journal. So I guess I'm on the right track since I already started one ;)

Anyway, there will be questions and things to ponder during the course, so I will list them here and share my thoughts.

From Lesson 2:

What is the most important thing in your life? 1. Creating balance & peace in my life. That sounds like a pageant contestant, huh? 2. Raising my children against the grain of mainstream society. That might sound "wierd" to most, but I have very strong feelings about how our society thinks and functions, and it's way off track (in my opinion, of course). I want my children to feel an inner peace that does not come from material items. I don't want them to do as I have done- reach 33 years old and wonder what they have done with their lives and where all their time and money has gone.

What do you need to do to nurture your own awareness and personal growth? I need to stop procrastinating. I need to start "doing" instead of just "thinking".


What is the most recent item you purchased on "auto pilot"? How did you feel a few days after you bought the item? I can't remember. I have been consciously not purchasing things I don't need for several months now. I can pick something big from the past, though. A car. I had this huge impulse to get a "new" car. I had a job with insane driving miles, and one day I got it in my head that I "needed" a car with better gas mileage. I spent HOURS at the car lot getting the loan and all that crap. They haggled and stalled so long that I spent more than I should have just to get the Hell out of there. So, right away, I knew it was a bad deal. But I was so tired with being there so long after a long day's work already that I stayed and agreed to whatever. When I got home, I KNEW I'd made a mistake- higher payment, too long of a loan. I felt dirty and ashamed. I felt like an idiot.

How do you feel when you want things? Like a drug addict. I can't stop thinking about them until I get them at any means necessary. This is what I have been working on the past few months. I tore up all credit cards and started trying to pay them off. The debt was so bad, though, that to pay all the cards and keep my credit good, I had to charge more for the necessities (groceries). I made the decision to file bankruptcy and start over on my financial life. At that point, you can't use credit, so it actually helped me get rid of my spending addiction- if I wanted it, tough shit, there was no possible way to get it, so I've learned how to control that urge and do without. I've also been rudely awakened to what I need and what I want. I'm really proud to say today that I have gained this new awakening and am "on the road to recovery".

How would your life be different if you were fully aware of the path you have chosen? I hope that from here on out, I will be on the path I have chosen, so ask me again in 10 years.

The House...

Where the hell do I START???? With 4 kids and the crappola they accumulate, I'm just not sure where to start. I can spend an entire day getting the house spotless, but without CONSTANT attention, it is demolished w/in an hour. Seriously.

I gave 50% of the toys to Goodwill. I give clothes away as they grow out of them, and yet...it's as if I've done none of those things for the last year.

Is there a strategy I can use that is reasonable to accomplish the goal of simplifying my home efficiently?

Saturday, July 08, 2006

Day 1

I want to live simple.

I have been hearing things here and there about the concept of "Voluntary Simplicity" for a while now. I am intrigued. I just signed up through an online course from Barnes and Noble to learn more. I got my book at the library today, and I'm ready.

So I've decided to share my journey as it progresses.

About me: Well. I'm simple. I'm a mom to 4 children. I have a great husband, a roof over my head, a car to drive, and food in my fridge. I suspect that compared to other Americans, my life is pretty simple already. But I know I can do better.
My nemesis is DEBT. I've been in debt since I was 17 years old. It all started with Macy's. I got my first job there, and they gave me a credit card. Today, I am 33 years old, and since that first Macy's card, I have held some sort of debt every single day of my life. And I'm TIRED. I don't need all this crap cluttering my life. What I need is to live each moment as fully and deliberately as I can. I've worked by debt up and down several times, but now it is going to stop. I'm ashamed to say it, but I'm taking the easy way out- I've filed for bankruptcy. Not the most noble way to "start over", but it was the best option for me and the hole I have dug for myself and my family. A fresh start. A new beginning.